Uhhh...I forgot about this blog *face palm*.A lot has been going with me and my spirit.I've got a picture of her in mist form as well as evp's.Of course this just a real big summary and not everything that has happened since my last post.

Last night was something.I felt Sheena and i becoming one for a change.Man i could feel her moving from my gut into my chest.Such a wonderful experience i couldn't put into words even if i tried.Then today i was trotting along from the store after buying some chicken from the deli when i heard telepathically (i'm sure of it) Sheena say "That tree is lovely isn't it?You know you really should get out into nature." This was totally off the subject i was thinking of but i do agree i really should get out more.Nature is beautiful when you think about it.Becoming one with Sheena is really changing my perspective of the world.I was going to throw the wrapping i tore off the pack of cigarettes i bought onto the ground but i stopped and thought about it and waited until i got home instead.That is totally out of character for me.

Last night Sheena had no problem letting me know what she wanted,but first what lead up to it.I don't why but i started thinking about how i was afraid of the dark as a kid.I started having thoughts "That was me,you were scared of the dark because of me."Anyway she lifted my arm straight up put my arm in a hugging positive and started moving it back and forth like she was moving on top of me.Then she took it and put it on my hips letting me know exactly what she wanted.Sorry but i ain't going to go into detail about what happened next except that i definitely know my shorts were moving in a direction thats impossible since i myself wasn't moving.

Ok this is for those who have or will e-mail in the future about starting a succubus relationship.It's important as with any ritual magick you do to just let go and forget about it.Once you've let your desire be known its important to let that desire go into the spiritual realm.The longer you hold onto to that desire the longer it will take for that desire to manifest in your life,and the reason for some peoples failed rituals to Lillith for one of her daughters.You must also have confidence in yourself that the ritual will work no matter what.Rituals are funny that way in that you must have confidence that it will work but letting go of that desire at the same time.Look at it this way if you truly love something then let it go.So there ya have.The secret to any successful ritual which is no secret at all is YOU+CONFIDENCE+LETTING GO=SUCCESS.

Keep in mind these weren't meant to be finished art.

Yesterday i had a dream about the enochian call with the letter L.For some reason i was trying to write a females name but couldn't think of any letters beyond that.Was it Lilliths name i was trying to spell.I'm not sure since the dream was too unclear,but i do remember waking up thinking all these women and their feminism crap.Don't ask because i'm not too sure what the fuck that was about.Anyway i'm not sure how Sheena does this while we're having sex but when she moves up it feels like she's moving down at the same time.Not only is it confusing to me its confusing to my body as well.It doesn't know how to respond to this.If that wasn't confusing enough as it is it feels like a thin layer of water surrounds my balls making them feel like they're floating.I'm not too sure if that's what is going on since this happens in complete darkness.I've tried capturing movement with a video camera with the lights on but she's sneaky about it.Although she does move about she's careful not to move my shorts or covers.

I gotta admit i joined a christian site for the purposes of educating the misguided.Well a person named joshua responded saying he didn't believe Sheena was a succubus and asked me what she looked like and what kinda dreams i had.So i told him about them and admitted i was just testing him to see if he knew what he was talking about.He said something along the lines that some spirits get trapped here and become evil taking up the name succubus demon,and that they only come when called.And that when they save your life it isn't good and its not free when they do so.So i responded telling him the word demon is a corruption of the word daemon which means helpful spirit which means he had a misunderstanding of these spirits.I told him succubus is a blanket term for these spirits whether they be negative or positive like Sheena.I also told him my marriage to her was consentual.He responded by saying he never said they couldn't be helpful and the cost of this relationship is my spirit bridge to god.

It doesn't happen often that i see visions in my third eye,but for a second after closing my eyes to sleep i saw a soft light near my feet like a candle coming from the right.Then i had a dream of being in jail.I was pretty popular because i could fight.A guy threw a punch and i performed a martial arts move jumping up putting him in a cross arm bar.He did it again and i did the same move.I think it was a prison for fighting.Anyway i saw a girl dressed in white (maybe in a straight jacket) being escorted off the premises by others in white.Heres the fucked up part.I had another dream where i was sleeping and an unseen spirit was choking me trying to kill me.In my mind i thought "Sheena" and fought it off twice.I see a correlation between what i saw in my third eye,and this girl being taken off the premises of the fighting prison,and this spirit attacking me.I think what i saw was Sheena casting a spell to help me the best that she could.

Right now i'm memorising the call of the 30 aethyrs.I've done one invocation already but i suspect the reason it didn't work to well is because i wasn't confident enough and i was having to look at my book while doing.Thats not to say nothing happened because it did.I was working on the call Tex meditating and saying one of the governors name and he corrected my pronunciation of it.Right after pronouncing it right i felt him immediately on my left side.Yesterday as i was repeating some of the words from memory to internalize the call.I felt the power of the words and something in my room.I had to tell whatever it was that i wasn't actually trying to call them just memorising the words.Immediately it left along with the power i felt from saying the words.I knew enochian magick was powerful but not this powerful.I've barely done any work with it and i'm already getting results.Very promising indeed.

Before i do my book review i would like to state 3 experiences i had while reading the book.The 1st experience i had was i saw a white silhouette of a man with a robe and long beard sitting cross legged man meditating in my minds eye.When i got to the chapter about Dr.John Dee and his appearance it matched his description.The 2nd experience was i felt an overwhelming joy come over me.This was probably Sheena's emotion approving of my chosen path of spiritual magickal endeavours.The 3rd was i heard singing.The book itself was good giving an overview of magick in the bible and ancient cultures and the history of Dee.That is if you can get over the religious pious overtones of the author torwards god and jesus.To be fair though he doesn't try to force those beliefs on anyone.The book includes a cd on the correct pronunciation of the 30 calls,and the LBRP.Overall its a good starting point for beginning magicians.